How Much Help Can I Give?
Many parents are surprised by the answer to this question: “In
general, it is better to give too much help than not enough.”
Although there are many examples in the comics and cartoons about parents who stand proudly by “their” science fair projects with a blue ribbon or scream at the judges asking why “they” did not win, most parents instinctively know just how much help to give before the projects becomes “theirs” instead of their child’s.
Parents who help too much are the exception rather than the rule.
Since the first round of judging before SARSEF occurs at the school level, most projects that are largely planned and completed by a parent are eliminated by the judges at that level. However, to avoid any chance of that happening, there are some easy ways to “prove” that your child a parent assisting rather than completing the project.
- From the very beginning, have your children do some of the work in their own handwriting. Even little ones can make simple lists, draw pictures to represent their ideas and steps, and color in graphs. Although
you may later choose to help your child format some of these things in
a more final form, these notes and rough drafts should be included in
the “Lab Notebook”.
- Judges LOVE to see the messy beginnings and rough drafts. PLEASE include even the mistakes and false starts.
- You can help your child with the typing. Just make sure that whatever you type, they are sitting next to you and they are the one doing the dictating to you.
- The
limit of your child’s attention span is the limit of the help you
give at any one time. If you are helping your child to plan or conduct a part of the experiment, stop when the fidgeting begins to distract from the thinking process or doing of the step. Simply
say, “Whew, looks like we need a break. Let’s
work on this later. Let
me know when you are ready.” And
then wait, but not too long…
- One
of the most surprising and yet most common comments from the parents
of students in high school who make it to the International level of
competition is that they had to help their children “get going”. No matter how talented or dedicated a child may be, parents must remember that they are after all, first and foremost, children. Children will need structure and timelines to get everything in their busy lives done.
- Don’t
be afraid to set times to work on the project or suggest that the TV
could go off for an hour so that the next step could get done. Just
like with homework, the parents’ job is to see that everything
is in place to get the job done but not do it.
- Always
talk to your child about the project in terms of “Your project” and what “You did”, never “We should…” or “Our project is about…”. You are not competing. When
your child talks to others, make sure they always say “My project” because
you did not do it for them.
- Keep in mind that every great scientist had a mentor, someone to help and encourage. Your child deserves no less.
- Your child is an individual. Give as much or as little help as your child needs to get the project done. The rewards are worth every moment that you spend together. In fact, the greatest reward is that your and your child spent time together getting it done. Those memories that you create together will be the prize that lasts a lifetime.
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